


Suffused

by hunters_retreat



Series: Taking Chances [5]
Category: Dark Angel
Genre: Alec is a good father, Being transgenic sucks, Ben is a brat, Logan has the patience of a saint, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-22
Updated: 2015-08-22
Packaged: 2018-04-16 17:10:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4633410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hunters_retreat/pseuds/hunters_retreat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He heard something like the phone drop and Ben’s voice, more distant.  “Daddy!”  And then the phone line went dead.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Suffused

 

  
  
“Logan?”

“Ben?”

“Something’s wrong.”

Logan could hear the tears thick in his throat. “Ben, what happened?”

“Daddy… something’s wrong! Come help!” He heard something like the phone drop and Ben’s voice, more distant. “Daddy!”

And then the phone line went dead.  
  


 

“Ben?”

Logan was trying his best to keep the panic from his voice but he knew it wasn’t working well. He didn’t know what was happening, but he’d managed to make it there, he hoped in time.

“Ben?”He used the spare key when the five year old didn’t open the door and he pushed into the room, afraid but unable to stop himself in case something was really wrong.When Ben had called, he’d been crying and nothing made the kid cry except his nightmares and being separated from Alec.

He made his way through the living room and found Ben curled up on the floor in the hallway outside Alec’s bedroom. “Ben?”

Ben looked up and threw himself at Logan, his whole body shaking against his terror. “Help Logan!”

He didn’t know what to do with the shaking boy in his arms. Ben barely tolerated him, even though he watched the boy every time Alec had to work. He just help him close though. He didn’t try to put Ben down as he moved towards the door, knowing whatever it was, he’d seen already. Instead, he held the boy close with one arm and pushed the door all the way open. He knew what it was, as soon as he saw it. He’d seen it once before with Max.

“Ben, I need to set you down so I can get to Alec.”

The little boy sniffled against his chest but nodded. Logan set him down, and he wanted to sob himself, seeing Alec pale and sweaty, his body shivering in what he knew to be small seizures that were both precursor to another and the trailing end of the last one. He leaned in to drop his hand over Alec’s head to see if he was feverish but he felt fine considering. “I’m here Alec. Gonna take care of you and Ben so don’t worry.”

He looked at the boy and gave him a small smile. “I just need to find his medicine.” He assured the kid. “He needs tryptophan or he has seizures. He must have missed a few doses or something.”

He didn’t want to think about why he might have, what could have made the usually self-aware man to miss the medication he knew he needed.Especially since Alec had been through this before.Taken captive and forced to live without it until it was life threatening and his captors had given him just enough to keep him alive.Alec never really talked about it, but he knew enough to know that Alec didn’t take his serotonin deficiency lightly.

Ben came up behind Logan as he looked in the bathroom, trying to find the medication. “Here.” Logan looked down at Ben in surprise, because in his hand was the small container he knew Alec kept it in. “I didn’t know.” The boy said, tears filling his eyes.

“Let’s get these to Alec and then we’ll talk about it.” He said, grabbing a glass of water to take in to his lover. He sat down on the bed and pulled Alec’s head up slightly, placing the tryptophan on his tongue. When he held the water to Alec’s mouth he waited until Alec nodded slightly and helped him drink enough to get the pills down.

“Ben, can you get a wash cloth and wet it in the bathroom for me?”

Ben ran from the room and came back a moment later, far faster than a normal person could have completed the task, and handed it to Logan. Logan handed it back and smiled. “Think he’d like to have you do it Ben. Just wipe it over his face, help him cool back down after all that.”

He watched as Ben became steadier, his hands shaking less and his body calming more. His eyes still held fear, but he didn’t look like he’d fall into tears right away. Alec was sleeping and though his body still had tremors from time to time, Logan knew it was fading. In an hour he’d give him more tryptophan and that should be enough to get him through the night. It would be a tough few days for Alec, but he’d be alright.

 

“So, what happened Ben?” He asked as he handed the little boy a glass of juice. He took a long drink of water, finally feeling a little calmer himself.

“I…” Ben looked down into his glass, avoiding making eye contact. “Daddy said I couldn’t have it. He said it was his and it wasn’t candy and I couldn’t have it.”

“And you wanted it.”

Ben nodded. “I didn’t know.”

“I know you didn’t.” He kept his voice calm but he wanted to strangle the kid. He hid Alec’s tryptophan? Why the hell hadn’t Alec just gotten more?

“He said he needed to get more cause he lost it, but then he couldn’t find any and I was going to give it back but then he said he had the milk and he was okay.”

Goat milk.He knew the transgenics drank it when they couldn’t get the tryptophan but it was in lower doses. Alec would have had to drink a lot to keep from getting sick and then it would have been just enough to keep the tremors at bay.

“And?”

“I was going to give it back.” Ben said, throwing himself off the bed and back into Logan’s arms with a speed and strength that almost knocked Logan over. He held the boy tight, not knowing what else to do. “If I keep it he needs me.” The boy sobbed.

“Ben…” He knew his voice sounded thick, but he understood now, why he’d hidden them. He hadn’t known and Alec obviously hadn’t explained how important they were to him. “It’s alright. Alec, he’s your Daddy right? He’s always going to need you.” He said, running a soothing hand down the boys back. “You didn’t mean to do anything and I know that. He will too when he wakes up.”

“He’s gonna be mad. It’s my fault.” He shushed the boy, but he continued anyway. “I spilled the milk. It was an accident but it was all gone and Daddy looked really upset and he said he was going to call his friend because he needed to get pills. I knew he needed them so I went to my room to find them and when I came back he was on the floor shaking.”

He didn’t answer, just continued to stroke the little boy’s hair until Ben finally fell asleep in his arms. He sat down on the bed so that he could still be close to Alec and just rested him back against the headboard. Ben snuffled a little in his sleep, but Logan just kissed his forehead and held him tight to keep the nightmares at bay.  
  


 

He didn’t know what time he woke, the sky was still dark though and as he blinked he realized what had wakened him. He still held Ben in his arms, but Alec was awake, obviously feeling better, and sitting up, looking at the two of them with a half smile on his face.

“What happened?” He asked softly, his voice hoarse from the way his muscles had seized on him.

“Ben called me. I came over and you were having seizures.”

Alec sighed. “Couldn’t find the pills. There were supposed to be getting a new supply in tomorrow. Figured I could make it that long.”

“Ben had them.”  
  
“What?”

“He had them. He took them so that you would need him.”

Alec opened his mouth to say something, but then stopped.

“I know it doesn’t make much sense as an adult, but it meant something to him.”

“No, it makes perfect sense.” Alec said, then looked away. “I get it. I mean… before… when you still had the endoskeleton? Wanted to smash that thing so you’d need me to help you instead.”

“What?”

Alec still didn’t look at him, but reached out and touched Ben’s cheek softly. “Manticore did a number on both of us I guess.”

Logan nodded because he didn’t know what to say to that.How could Alec not have known how important he was to him?How… hell, it was Alec.Of course he didn’t know.As much as he’d grown since he’d gotten out of Manticore, there were still a lot of things the Transgenic just didn’t get.

In light of that, and his own heart-rending terror earlier in the evening, he captured Alec’s hand and pulled it close, pressing a kiss to the inside of his wrist. He waited until Alec looked up at him and then he smiled, saying the words he’d held back, always believing that Alec knew but not wanting to make him uncomfortable with the declaration. Tonight changes a few things. “I love you Alec.”

Alec’s eyes widened and he knew he’d said something unexpected, something Alec didn’t know how to process with a smirk and a light rejoinder. “Don’t know why you haven’t figured that out by now, but I do. You do something like this again though, and I might kill you.”

Ben shifted in his arms and then looked up sleepily to see Alec awake. “Daddy!” He leaped from Logan’s arms and into Alec’s, no tears, but a litany of ‘sorrysorrysorry’ into Alec’s chest.

Alec held him close, whispering into his ear until they were both lying on the bed, with Ben finally relaxing into Alec’s chest.Logan thought about the couch and thought about driving home and decided it would probably be better to give Alec and Ben the time alone.He sat up and was about to crawl off the bed when a hand gripped his.He looked back to find it was Ben’s hand wrapped around his, tugging him back.

“Stay.”

His bottom lip quivered at the request and it was followed by a deeper “Stay Logan,” from Alec.He didn’t have the strength in him to fight them both, not when he wanted to be there more than anything else.

He got up long enough to pull off his shirt and pants, and slid under the covers in his boxers. It took a few minutes to get comfortable with Ben between them, but then Alec was lying on his side facing Logan and Ben was curled up into his chest, one hand holding onto Alec’s forearm and the other gripping Logan’s thumb as his hand rested on Ben’s hip where he’d placed it.

He took a deep breath and watched as Alec’s lips curved into a soft smile, something he didn’t know how to read on his face. It looked good though, like acceptance and coming home and all the things Alec didn’t know but Logan wanted him to have.

“I love you too.”

The words were whispered but he heard them loud and clear, felt the heat of the confession as it settled between them, wrapping around the little boy between them and curling into their lives.

He took a deep breath and leaned in lightly, the barest of kisses against his lover’s lips. Alec let it be just a simple touch, and that in itself let him know that Alec was still exhausted.

“Good night Love.”Logan said softly, then leaned in and kissed their boy on the head.He didn’t realize he’d thought it until it was out there and he realized that for all its suddenness, it was true all the same.Ben had let him in tonight and there was no way Logan was going to lose that.

He’d brought Alec a child home and thought once upon a time that he would do everything he could to help Alec be a good father to the boy. It was only now that he realized what it was he’d wanted that night. He’d wanted them to be a family. He wanted to be a father to him too. Tonight, he got his wish.

He felt suffused with the possibilities and he watched them fall asleep.It wasn’t until much later, happy and giddy from drinking in their presence, that Logan was finally able to fall asleep with his boys.

 

 

 


End file.
